


Usually, I'm All By Myself

by lonelyghostie



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, Kozume Kenma Needs a Hug, Kuroo Tetsurou is a Good Friend, Light Angst, M/M, Soft Kuroo Tetsurou, Somewhat, Songfic, Thought Projection, kenma is tired, they just want to help, worried nekoma volleyball club
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:33:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28499100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lonelyghostie/pseuds/lonelyghostie
Summary: Well, it's not like he put in a lot of effort and motivation when it comes to improving in volleyball. He's not like Hinata who's enthusiastic and hyper as hell about the sport and he's not as passionate as Kuroo and his teammates either. Which is why he shouldn't be feeling like the world is ending at the moment.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Kudos: 64





	Usually, I'm All By Myself

**Author's Note:**

> this was just a spur of the moment thing that I decided to write so it's v short.
> 
> unedited because what is editing.

_**Do Not Enter's written on the doorway...** _

The lights of the gym are too bright for Kenma's heavy and tired eyes. He collapsed on the gym floor after finishing laps with the team and now he thinks he might be going to heaven with how fast his heart is beating and how he's breathing raggedly. 

Everyone around him seems to be perfectly fine, the only indication that they were tired from running was their sweaty backs and slightly off breathing. They're not laying on the floor, feeling like death, like Kenma is and that fact shouldn't have his stomach churning all of a sudden. 

Kenma is on his second year in Nekoma now and with all the running and chores he'd done in his first year in the volleyball club, he thought he'd at least improved his stamina.

He lazily eyes Yamamoto who's talking animatedly on his phone with his hand on his hip. Behind him, Lev was visibly teasing Yaku about something that's probably related to his height once more. The blond doesn't understand where they all get this energy from when he's here feeling so exhausted that he could just pass out. 

Is he really part of the volleyball club? Kenma snorts to himself at the thought. He certainly doesn't look like it. 

He rolls to his side, his back to the rest of the team and watches as his sweat slides down to the floor. Scrunching his nose, the only thing he thinks of is how disgusting he felt. 

Well, it's not like he put in a lot of effort and motivation when it comes to improving in volleyball. He's not like Hinata who's enthusiastic and hyper as hell about the sport and he's not as passionate as Kuroo and his teammates either. Which is why he shouldn't be feeling like the world is ending at the moment. 

His fingers twitch, itching to get a hold of his phone, controller, game boy or anything that could distract him from pondering like this. Where was Kuroo? He couldn't see the other boy at all and his vision was getting a bit blurry. Wow, he must be _really_ tired. 

The blond's heart rate abruptly picks up and he immediately sits up. 

This unfortunately catches the attention of the others who turned their heads to him, worry in their faces. Kenma hates worrying his friends. 

_**Why can't everyone just go away?** _

His hands are clammy as he tries to ground himself. A futile attempt since he has nothing to hold on to. What is happening to him? 

Kenma's body goes cold all over and he's starting to sweat even more for an unknown reason. Is he even breathing properly? Why was breathing so hard to him out of the blue? 

He registers a hand on his shoulder and the muttering voices of his friends surrounding him. He can't feel or understand much of anything that they were saying though because his body is being pricked by needles. 

"Kenma-san, are you okay?" 

"What's going on?" 

"He's not responding!" 

"Kenma, please calm down—" 

Right. Right, he needs to calm down. Why does he need to calm down? It's not like he was panicking, was he? What was there to panic about? It was ridiculous that he only felt like he wasn't doing enough and now here he was being a baby about it. 

The voices started to get louder and he can't focus on anything else. A headache begins to form and he looks up to his teammates and frowns because they were _too noisy._

"Go away," He mutters unintelligibly and when Inuoka just asks what he was trying to say, he yells, silencing everyone. "Go away!" 

The blond feels like he's the worst. His friends were just trying to help him and he didn't even want it from them. Where was Kuroo? Why wasn't Kuroo here? 

"Kenma, please tell us what's wrong, we just want to help." Yaku said softly, reaching out to maybe try and touch Kenma. 

_**Except you...** _

He doesn't offer a response to Yaku and sits quietly on the floor. Kenma brings his knees to his chest and attempts to hide away from the world. It doesn't occur to him that the gym became quiet and there were no more shadows looming over him. 

There was no way of telling how long he sits there, straining to steady his breathing but when he looks up after what felt like hours, Kuroo is sitting across him, staring at him intently with a seemingly bored expression. 

Kenma glanced outside and it looked like the sun was beginning to set already. The gym was also empty which makes him wonder where his friends went. Weren't they just with him a few minutes ago? 

He turns to look back at Kuroo and slowly unfurls from his position to a more comfortable one. The older teen across him still doesn't say any word or make any sound which should make Kenma feel uneasy but instead it didn't fail to ground him. 

Silently, the blond reaches out a hand and Kuroo doesn't hesitate to take it and gently pull Kenma closer to him. Kenma settles in between Kuroo's legs and he leans his back to the other's chest. 

It was there that he felt warm and even though he still has the urge to cry, everything was a little more right with Kuroo there with him. Kuroo places his chin on top of Kenma's head and hums a song that they used to play a lot when Kenma cries back when he was younger. 

The blond lightly chortles upon hearing it and Kuroo smiles at the sound. The older boy takes Kenma's hand in his and rubs small circles on the palm of his hands until Kenma's heartbeat slows to a normal pace. 

"Do you want to talk about it?" Kuroo murmurs after a few minutes. 

Kenma shakes his head no as an answer. 

"Do you want me to go get you something? Anything to make you feel better?" Kuroo asks softly. 

The only reply Kenma gives out is the tightening of his hold on Kuroo's hand. 

_**You can stay.** _

Kuroo already knows what this means as he kisses the crown of Kenma's head and grants him his wish. 

**Author's Note:**

> Song: Treehouse by Alex G 
> 
> This song makes me feel soft and so does Kuroken (人 •͈ᴗ•͈)
> 
> Happy New Year to everyone! :>


End file.
